Will i be gay?
What it could be:
I have a lovely relationship, a wonderful job, a bunch of friends supporting me. I'm in a good place right now. But at times, i can't help but look back over the years... what would i be if i were to score really well in my studies or even not be gay. hmmm...
I have never been an academic person. Well, my Maths started flunking when i'm in Primary 5. I went on to Normal Academic courses, spent 5 years in Assumption English School. I'm always in the crazy classes since my primary school days. I love arts, i hate maths and science. i can't never get the equations right. Despite all these failures in results, i kinda felt that i'm special. I hate doing the norms, maybe that's why i'm gay? I never really figure that out...
What IF i were to have a boyfriend during my teen days, and say, things worked out well for us, i might be working as a sales person now or the O.L [Office Lady] in the boring mini cubicle typing my data. Everyday, i wait for my dearest ah-boy to come n pick me up... occasionally, we might fight and i expect him to give in to me no matter who's fault is it.
When he proposed at the right time, i might say yes if i need not come out with any penny for the wedding. Oh, the man must be able to cook and clean the house well too. So, we will not have children, because i say so. Economic in Singapore does not allow couples to have time to date, let alone to have kids. They must be kidding...
It's not within our budget to have kids, too expensive to have children, mum[s] from both sides start nagging and i can't take nagging. Divorce might be the next option for the both is us... so, i will be single again, not wanting to have another BORING relationship with a man. I turn to woman. HEY, there you have it. I'm gay again!
So life is great for now. I can't wait for the next phrase to start. It might be crazy or scary but i guess i'm ready. i've grown up. Certain things have to let go, certain things have to move on. As long as i'm happy, i really don't care what the fvck people thinks.
I'm gay. period.
I have a lovely relationship, a wonderful job, a bunch of friends supporting me. I'm in a good place right now. But at times, i can't help but look back over the years... what would i be if i were to score really well in my studies or even not be gay. hmmm...
I have never been an academic person. Well, my Maths started flunking when i'm in Primary 5. I went on to Normal Academic courses, spent 5 years in Assumption English School. I'm always in the crazy classes since my primary school days. I love arts, i hate maths and science. i can't never get the equations right. Despite all these failures in results, i kinda felt that i'm special. I hate doing the norms, maybe that's why i'm gay? I never really figure that out...
What IF i were to have a boyfriend during my teen days, and say, things worked out well for us, i might be working as a sales person now or the O.L [Office Lady] in the boring mini cubicle typing my data. Everyday, i wait for my dearest ah-boy to come n pick me up... occasionally, we might fight and i expect him to give in to me no matter who's fault is it.
When he proposed at the right time, i might say yes if i need not come out with any penny for the wedding. Oh, the man must be able to cook and clean the house well too. So, we will not have children, because i say so. Economic in Singapore does not allow couples to have time to date, let alone to have kids. They must be kidding...
It's not within our budget to have kids, too expensive to have children, mum[s] from both sides start nagging and i can't take nagging. Divorce might be the next option for the both is us... so, i will be single again, not wanting to have another BORING relationship with a man. I turn to woman. HEY, there you have it. I'm gay again!
So life is great for now. I can't wait for the next phrase to start. It might be crazy or scary but i guess i'm ready. i've grown up. Certain things have to let go, certain things have to move on. As long as i'm happy, i really don't care what the fvck people thinks.
I'm gay. period.
posted by UntrainedNinja at
6:07 PM
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